Vulnerable to manipulation
ADHD’ers might be more vulnerable to manipulation:
🤹♀️ Impulsivity: we might not take the time to critically evaluate information or the intentions of others, making quick, impulsive decisions.
😵💫 Difficulty in Sustaining Attention: some people might present information in a way that captures our fleeting attention, making it easier to sway opinions or decisions.
🧠 Short term memory: we might doubt if we remember things correctly. Especially when words and actions don’t match, we might blame ourselves.
💔 Rejection Sensitivity: the need for connection might be exploited by providing false or exaggerated assurances, creating a sense of belonging that may not be genuine.
😭 Low Self-Esteem: manipulators can exploit our vulnerabilities by offering false praise, promises to boost self-worth temporarily. Many of us also tend to overthink and rationalise other people’s behaviour.
trust your body
Your body often reacts instinctively to situations, especially those that may involve potential harm or manipulation. If you have a gut feeling that something is wrong, trusting that feeling can be essential for protecting yourself.
Therapy can be a great tool to explore these feelings and come up with decisions that support your wellbeing.
crossed boundaries
Physical and emotional discomfort can also be signals that someone is trying to manipulate or control you, prompting you to assert your boundaries. If you find yourself questioning whether a behaviour is acceptable or struggling with conflicting emotions about a situation, it may be an indication that your boundaries are being tested.
Take some time to reflect on your feelings and identify the specific actions that made you feel uncomfortable. Then clearly communicate your personal boundaries, be specific about what you find acceptable and unacceptable in various situations.
guilt
Manipulators may use guilt-tripping as a tactic to make someone feel responsible for their problems or emotions. They might also deflect responsibility for their actions by blaming others, making them feel guilty for things they didn’t do or couldn’t control. Ask yourself if the guilt being imposed is reasonable, and consider alternative perspectives to gain a more balanced view of the situation. Recognize your own worth and do not let guilt undermine your self-esteem.
inconsistency
By behaving inconsistently, manipulators make it challenging to predict their actions or understand their motives. Observe patterns of inconsistency, recognize when there are differences between what they say and what they do. It can be helpful to keep a record of your interactions, including conversations, promises, and commitments. Clearly communicate your expectations and seek clarification.
COACHING CAN HELP!
ADHD coaching can be instrumental in helping ADHD’ers deal with rejection sensitivity through various strategies and techniques:
- Understanding strengths and values
- Building self-asteem
- Stress management
- Communicating boundaries
- Deepening self-awareness
If you’d like to work together, please reach out here. 
ADHD & Relationships workbook
It’s important for couples to openly communicate with their partners about their boundaries and expectations in the relationship. Working together to find solutions can help rebuild trust and foster a more understanding and supportive environment.
By acknowledging difficulties and finding the tools to address them, relationships can become stronger and more resilient. If you’d like to work through relationship challenges together, check out this workbook.
